…Clueless

I hate this guy. I simply hate him. The way he talks, his voice, his style, his accent… he manages to show the world that he is a thorough wannabe.

If I remember correctly, the very first time Amit Tandon came in front of the camera was for the reality show Coke [V] Popstars, which used to air on Channel V. On that very show, Tandom had told the producers of the show that his girlfriend had died and that he wanted to become a superstar for her (which is a bucket full of horse shit in my opinion). Tandon failed to make a mark in that reality show but his tantrums and dramas caught the eye of the people at [V] and he was hired as a VJ. From there on, he participated in Indian Idol, where he tortured everyone with his crappy voice and also did a couple of television serials.

It seems, Tandon has finally managed to save some cash to launch his very own music album. Believe me people, music cannot sound crappier!!

The title song, “Tanha” is a clear rip-off of the Panjabi MC song, Mirza II (or Mirza 2) sung by Surinder Shinda. The video reminds me somewhat of the video of Quit Playing Games (Backstreet Boys) and Back for Good (Take That). The way Tandon is throwing his hands and making gay faces in the video makes me all the more nauseatic.

Tanha, Lonely At Heart eh?! Seems you’re going to be the lone person listening to your pathetic songs.  Amit Tandon needs to get a reality check. Dude, stick to where you’re making some cash atleast - the saas bahu soaps. Your cheesy accent and gay mannerisms are too much to be tolerated elsewhere.

This is certainly hilarious. People like L.K. Advani sure know how to make a fool out of themselves. I fail to understand that why, whatever they do is not their own decision but directly as a consequence of others’ actions?

Now, L.K. Advani does not have the balls or maybe his false ego just hurts too much if he would admit that he is emlating the U.S.A. President Elect, Barack Obama. “Advaniji”, as the B.J.P. asslickers address him, was gifted a website for campaigning on his 81st birthday. This is a result of the successful online campaign that Obama had launched for himself which eventually saw him getting elected to office.

And… OH-MY-FUCKING-GOD!? 81st birthday? Die already, dude!! Strange are the ways of nature. People like Advani who love enticing violence throughout the country are the people who have the longest lives. “Advanji”, there is still time. At this juncture of your life, go for religious or spiritual excursion to wash your sins. Since I’m pretty sure you are computer illiterate, what use is a website? A better gift would have been a forced retirement for the douchebag.

I use the StatPress plugin on this blog installation to gather some basic and live statistics of the visitors to my blog. I also use the WassUp plugin to capture some similar statistics. While both plugins have their own pros and cons, there is one thing that used to bother me about the StatPress plugin.

While there is an option to delete the older records from the table after a certain time, there is no option to empty the entire table of the stats. Why is this option required? Well, certain people like me host their blogs on servers which give a limited amount of database storage. Statistics plugins like WassUp and StatPress tend to accumulate a large amount of data and thereby take up a lot of database space.

WassUp has an option to empty the table whereas StatPress misses this functionality. I had to manually go into phpMyAdmin and empty the table. So, I decided to look into the plugin and try to add this functionality within it so that I could save myself from the hassle of going to a another software to manage the mess. I am no coder. I read through the entire code in statpress.php and made modifications as required.

I present to you, StatPress with empty table option.

As the above screenshot clearly shows, when you click on StatPress tab within your WordPress Dashboard, you will see an extra option called “Empty”. Clicking on it will delete all your stats from within the database and makes StatPress start afresh. However, please note that this action is permanent unless you have a previous backup. Once you click on Empty, it will empty your database without any further prompts or warnings.

DOWNLOAD : StatPress v 1.2.9.2 with Empty table option (79KB).

Those of you not wanting to undergo the exercise of downloading a new ZIP file of a plugin, deactivating the original StatPress 1.2.9.2 and reactivating this plugin may simply copy the entire code from the text file linked below.

DOWNLOAD : statpress.txt

Open the statpress.txt file. Either save it as statpress.php and overwrite the wp-content/plugins/wp-statpress/statpress.php file. Otherwise, from within your WordPress Dashboard, click on Plugins. Navigate to StatPress and click on Edit. Replace the entire text in the textbox on the next page with the text from the statpress.txt file you just downloaded.

Please note that I am in no way responsible to any damage or loss whatsoever the use of this modified plugin may cause to your installation. I am Jack of all trades, master of none. I don’t claim the code and modification is perfect. It is just a basic implementation. Take all precautions before you activate this plugin.

Finally, the development of StatPress seems to have stalled. There is another plugin StatPress Reloaded. Check it out.

No. I’m not on a In.com bashing/loving/reporting spree here. It just so happened that I was browsing both the websites side by side when I noticed the favicons on their respective tabs.

Now, is it just me or the “in” part in both the logos seem kind of similar. The similar background colour, similar text colour and except for a few minor tweaks, the “in” looks quite the same. Now, this could be a far-fetched theory but I’m just writing what I feel (and what I see!).

It was the 1st of August, 2008. I came to know about a website, “in.com”, which had been launched by the guys at Web18 and offered free email accounts @in.com. The offer seemed lucrative to me. In.com is a very tiny domain and I wanted an email address on it, jus for the cosmetic value of the address.

I went over to the website. It clearly said that it was in “beta” stage (testing). I registered for a couple of addresses just for the heck of testing out the service. Then I thought of creating an ID with some special characters. I tried underscore, hyphen and a dot. The minimum number of characters for an ID was 4. Then a brilliant (exaggeration) idea struck me. What if I could compensate some of the characters in my ID with special characters?!!!

Hyphen (-) and underscore (_) are so Web 1.0. I stuck with dot (.). Now, just to test my hypothesis, I typed four dots (….) in the “Email Id” space on the registration page. Immediately, below the form element, it said “Account Available : Yes” !! I never expected this. Seriously. I had my idea in my head but had never expected the software to be vulnerable to it. I went over to the next step and tried to register but it failed.

I hurried back to the registration page again and this time I put it “..in” as my ID. Sure enough, it was available. I went to the next step and BOOM! I was in! Now you, I and everybody would say, what’s the big deal with an email address that starts with two stupid periods? Well the thing is, the in.com website magically eliminated the dots from my id and now I had a shiny 2 letter username on their website, which I supposedly could not have had.

I had “in@in.com” with me. I logged in with “..in” and seperately with “in” and I got into my mailbox successfully. This email address was tiny, very tiny! I liked it just for that. The interface kind of sucked. Yes, they tried to make it all Web 2.0 with ajax and stuff but it was still slow and buggy. On top of that, their SPAM filter was and still is simply useless. And SPAM was the biggest reason that I never really suck to this tiny email address that I had acquired.

It seemed that every third person on this planet earth, who registered for any serive on the web, typed in their email as in@in.com! From Friendster accounts to Cellphone purchases, I got emails from everywhere! On top of that, there was the regular SPAM which targeted my inbox. When there are so many disposable email address services on the Internet, why the hell do you guys have to type in a random email address when you register on a website?! So practically, the super cool looking email address that I had somewhow registered for myself was simply useless because of the sheer amount unsolicited messages that it received with each passing day.

The account kept lying unused for about a fortnight after which again I tried to login. It failed. I tried again. It failed again. I logged into the other 2 letter and 3 letter accounts that I had registered along with in@in.com I successfully logged into each of them. So it was evident that the folks at In.com had found out about my successful circumvention of their registration restrictions and had disabled the email address : in@in.com.

The same day, I tried to see if the bug still existed in their software. It did. It was there for a few more weeks. This morning, when I checked, it was gone. They had patched their software. A bug, which should have not been there in the first place itself; a bug, that should have been found on the first day of the testing; a bug, which affected the most fundamental module of their software - the registration had been rectified after months and months of so-called testing.

So what have I learnt after all this? Well for starters, the other email accounts I had grabbed are still intact and functioning. Secondly, I should have sold off the email address to some fool while I had the chance (just kidding) ! Thirdly, the guys at Web18 need to employ some actual testers at their development centre itself. And lastly, the advertisments that they are currently running on their TV18 network make no sense at all.

And one more thing, the guys at in.com should give me the id back as a token of gratitude for not disclosing the bug until it was rectified (some might say I should have informed them myself). What would I do if I got in@in.com back? The answer is nothing until people start using their real email addresses or take some pain and use a disposable email service to register accounts on different websites accross the web.

Adios.

September 9th, 2008 : The day You left us. Without any warning. Struggled to keep you alive for 4 days. You had other plans. I don’t remember myself crying so bitterly, ever. Rest in Peace. Love you.

I took these screenshots a few weeks back from one of my college labs. We were asked to run some SQL queries on our systems when I saw the Nod32 icon in the taskbar. I was surprised that my college was using it and had it on all the systems in the lab.

Just out of curiosity, I went to the control panel of the software to see if the software was licensed or not. To my utter surprise, it was a cracked version.  It used the Nod32FiX by nSane if I’m not wrong. Check out the screenshots.

After a few more days snooping around in the college labs, I found that many of the PCs in my college labs have the same cracked version of Nod32 installed. Since the students are not allowed administrative access, it is most definitely the work of the college authorities. Students had given feedback that all the systems were infested with worms that further infect their USB sticks when copy the stuff they’ve made. So this is the remedy the college has come up with. Bravo!

…”Aap bari ho”…

…FINALLY!

I find it rather amusing or should I say disturbing, that the Supreme Court of India, intervened an overturned an order of a Delhi HC Tribunal and placed a ban on The Students Islamic Movement of India (SIMI). Mind you, I am no supporter of SIMI and do not condone their activities. According to the recent evidence, they are a bunch of terrorists. But neither am I a supporter of hypocrisy.

If the SIMI can be banned, why cannot the same be done to the Shiv Sena, Bajrang Dal, Vishva Hindu Parishad, Maharashtra Navnirman Sena and the supporter of all the communal violence in our land, the Bhartiya Janta Party?

Are the people of India so naive? Are they blindfolded? Can’t they see what is happening around them? Why do they fail to realise that they are being “USED” as puppets! I’m talking to you, yes you! The one with a sword in his hand and wading through the Tavi river to cross into Jammu. Do you actually feel the BJP or any of the other parties urging you to risk your life give two fucking hoots about you? They don’t you jackass. Do you think you’ll get a piece of that land once it is transferred to the Amarnath Shrine Board? When you know the answer, why act so anti-social?

Jammu and Kashmir has been burning for the last 2 months - for no reason! The initial protests by the muslim youth were not carried out in support of the people whose land was being transferred (the entire land in question is not forest land). It was also instigated by the pro muslim parties with a lame excuse that the Amarnath board wants to settle Hindus in J & K. Seriously, are you guys retarded or what? To actually buy land in J & K and settle there you have to be a state subject, which the outside Hindus obviously would not have been. What is the fuss all about? And even if they do settle there, what is the fucking harm? Do they pose any threat to you?

In my opinion, there is no difference between the Islamic and the Hindu parties. They are a burdern on the society. They are a bunch of illiterate selfish fools who have an amazing knack of convincing people to murder each other for their cause. They are the real terrorists.

Recently there was a bunch of another assholes who wanted a seperate state of Gorkhaland within India. They caused bandhs and disrupted normalcy in the region. What is it that you guys seek? What will a seperate state give you? Oh I get it! You want reservations etc. etc. ! Did I hit some wrong nerve? OK, you wanna say that the state will give the Gorkhas their identity. Motherfuckers.. are we not all INDIANS.. is it not good enough as an Identity?

Another variety of dickheads that resides in our country is the Gujjars. They fought with the police, torched vehicles, got themselves killed.. for what? Reservation. This shows how dumb you people are. Seriously, if you keep acting this way, you will forever remain a backward caste. That’s because you just don’t want to grow. You choose to die for reservation but you choose not to die for free education.

Shiv Sena and MNS : I can only say that they must be banned. Their activities are against the country, it’s people and the constitution.

Finally, how can I forget our very own warriors, the Sikhs.  You guys choose to clash with the Dera Sacha Sauda followers but have absolutely no interest in improving the situation in your state. The youth of Punjab are either addicts or jobless illiterate fools. But religion is more important to them than even their own well being.

I recently saw an advertisement for a a new political party - Jago Party. It claims to be a party of the people. I went over to their website and read through their objectives. The only reason I have decided to vote for them in any future election is that they are not being run by a family (I’m looking at you Congress) and are not trying to woo the voters on the basis of religion or caste (I’m looking at everybody else here).

Why is it that the people in our country identify themselves with religion and caste and why being Indian is secondary to them? Why is it that we “Indians” will go kill each other on the call of leaders of the Hurriyat or the BJP? Why have we all turned a blind eye towards reality? Why can’t we stop passing the buck? Why can’t we think on our own and follow what the corrupt politicians say? Why is it that all our top politicians are rapists and gangsters? Why is there no sense of belonging, a sense of being an Indian Citizen?

Where is the love, my fellow Indians, where is the love?

… But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And when you hate then you’re bound to get irate, yeah
Madness is what you demonstrate
And that’s exactly how anger works and operates
Man, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y’all, y’all

People killin’, people dyin’
Children hurt and you hear them cryin’
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
‘Cause people got me, got me questionin’
Where is the love? …

From what I saw on Zee Business, the iPhone is to be launched in India by Airtel on the 22nd of August. They also telecast a telephonic interview with some president of Airtel who confirmed that there would be no subsidy on the iPhone.

That final statement alone is a deal breaker for me. 3G is a long way to come. Free WiFi is not a realistic option. EDGE is really crappy in its current form. What is the use for a device whose USP is its ablity to connect to the Internet but has no means to do so in India? And now that Airtel has confirmed that there is going to be no subsidy, I can safely say that we must forget about getting the iPhone for anywhere around Rs. 8000 to 12000. Not that I’m dying to. Get realistic people. Buy an E71.